* Remembering Cole *

Cole wearing a favorite red cap

March 31, 1994 - March 13, 2007

Every once in awhile a flame goes out too quickly. On March 13th just such a brilliant, glowing light flickered out -- making our world a little darker with its absence. This flame represented the life of Cole Baldwin. What can I say about this young man? What words can I share with you to help you understand the illumination that was his life?

I first met Cole in November. He was assigned to attend my reading group with several of his sixth grade classmates. It was my job to hold them accountable for the "conventions" of writing and the self-editing process. These particular students were selected to get a "boost" in preparation for junior high writing assessments next year. Having worked mainly with primary students, I was somewhat apprehensive about what to expect with this sixth grade group. My apprehension was short-lived, however. These students set to work and were diligent with every task assigned to them. They were proud of their accomplishments and expressed these sentiments to their sixth grade teacher. I am glad I had the honor and privilege of working with them....especially because of Cole.

Cole didn't just walk into a room....he made a grand entrance. He was a confident young man, comfortable in his own skin. Cole "marched to his own drummer." He had a wide selection of hats in his hat collection and would wear them to school with pride. He also liked to express himself with new and surprising changes to his appearance....such as the times when he shaved his head or sported a mohawk. He was just being Cole! At his recent memorial service, I discovered that Cole liked to run faster, climb higher, dive deeper. He was a kid who enjoyed living each day with zest and gusto; a kid who truly appreciated life. The church was filled with photos of Cole in action. Cole playing sports with his friends; Cole playing drums with his friends. Cole had a lot of friends! He was highly respected by his peers and was a friend to all.

Our school community was in a state of shock and grief as a result of this unexpected loss. When a student is alive and vibrant one day and suddenly gone the next, it comes as a devastating shock. We have been trying to find constructive ways to grieve and support one another, as well as Cole's family. We have been discussing ways to honor and remember Cole in the future.

We were told you slipped peacefully from this world, Cole. You had been quietly studying and getting ready for a new school day when the aneurysm occurred. Emergency surgery was performed, but you never regained consciousness....never awoke. Your family signed you up as an organ donor and because you lived, others will now live. This doesn't answer all the questions or lessen the pain of losing you, but it gives us some comfort knowing your flame will burn on and brighten the lives of others.

March 31st would have been Cole's 13th birthday. Thank you Cole, for the inspiration your young and short life was to me. As so often happens, the student often teaches the teacher. You taught me what it means to dare....dare to try....dare to live.... dare to be yourself; without reservation! As I live out my life I will try to remember the lesson you taught me.

Cole....Your light shines on. You are in my heart. I will always remember you! Godspeed!

* My Spiritual Birthday *March 28, 1999

My spiritual journey began as a very young girl; with my daddy at my bedside listening to my nighttime prayers. A treasured black and white photograph shows me kneeling beside the bed, my hands clasped in prayer to my Heavenly Father. My Daddy Don was a photography student at the time and captured that moment forever. I was only about three years old, but tender feelings of love for God began sprouting in my young heart at that time. I always knew God existed and was with me. I never doubted. Most young children come to God with a pure and unquestioning spirit. Maybe that is one reason God's word says we should come to Him "as a little child." Little children are accepting, innocent, trusting, loving, and seeking that same love in return. My love for God began here, but grew and matured over the course of my lifetime.

During my childhood I went to church regularly with my family. I always sought opportunities to draw closer to God. I went through my first communion and confirmation classes, attended neighborhood Bible studies, visited various churches at the invitation of school friends, and attended youth group activities. These events were all important in shaping me as a young person, but somehow I felt there was something missing in my relationship with God.

As an adult, I continued my search. I changed churches and started an intensive five-year Bible study program. I began to understand that to have a personal relationship with God the Father meant I needed a better understanding of his son, Jesus. God's word was opened up to me in a new way as I began to read about the life of Jesus with new "spiritual eyes"....I became a broken and contrite person. Something happened to my heart when I realized the price Jesus paid for the failings and sins of my own life; how He suffered and died because of His great love for me so that I would no longer have to pay that penalty myself. In love and gratitude and with flowing tears, I gave my heart and life to Him forever. I believe this was the defining moment in my spiritual journey. I now had a relationship with God through His Son, Jesus. From this moment on, I would allow Him to lead me into His truth.

From that moment He has always been with me. He leads me, protects me, encourages me, inspires me, and because He loves me, sometimes has to chastise me. He has also brought people into my life to challenge and teach me. For the past ten years God has been chiseling away at my life; like a fine piece of marble. He has been shaping and molding me into a woman who can better serve Him. I am ever thankful to those "brothers and sisters" who have walked alongside me on life's path....to teach me....guide me....walk with me....be my friend. You know who you are. You know what you have meant to me. We have studied together, researched together, fellowshipped together, cried together, and laughed together. We are connected in a bond that can never be severed. We are part of God's own family! We are "forever friends."



As a result of this continuous journey, and the encouragement of my spiritual family, on March 28, 1999 I was lowered into that "watery grave" of baptism and rose a new woman in Christ.... Does this mean that I am perfect and no longer make mistakes? No. Does this mean that I have an advocate before the throne of Almighty God? Yes! Hallelujah....Praise God! I have been redeemed by the blood of the Lamb, Jesus. He reigns today at God's right hand....and will come again....VERY SOON! The bride says, "Come Lord Jesus, Come!" Are you ready to meet the bridegroom? If you are not sure.... with the heart of a little child....ask Jesus to come into your life to forgive you and lead you into His Truth. He will! He promises! And His promises are true!

"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart..." Jer. 29:12-13



May God bless you, protect you, and guide you as you continue your own spiritual journey!

Dorothy

A special "Happy Spiritual Birthday" to Eli J. Earl....March 26, 1988. Your journey has been a difficult one. Keep the faith! Jesus loves you! Thank you for being my forever friend!

* My Father, My Hero *

Daddy Don taking it "slow and easy" in Mexico

March 21, 2005....The day we said our final good-byes to you, Dad, was one of the hardest days of my life. The family had gathered the week before, knowing that your passing from this earthly life was near. We spent our time just thankful for the opportunity to be together. We massaged your feet and back, played soft music nearby to comfort you, visited and shared stories, brought you some of your favorite things to eat, administered medications to ease your pain, and finally....brought a minister to anoint you and pray with you.

At first you enjoyed the company and the many visitors who dropped by to see you and share small talk. As the week progressed, your memories became more disjointed and jumbled. You didn't always make sense, but we savored every minute knowing the time was short. We sat by your bedside and held your hand. On that final day, I lay next to you on the bed. I snuggled up close and put my arm around you....needing to be as close to you as I could. The television was on and your sons were watching some sporting event....long forgotten. You had stopped talking the day before and your breathing was slow and shallow. There wasn't much more to do but hold you close and make you comfortable.

I raised up on one elbow....my eyes searching the face of the man who had been the representative of my Heavenly Father on earth. The man who had laid down the law in our household, but who had also showered us with his love. I recalled the many "father-daughter" adventures we shared over the years. You taught me how to ride a motorcycle on grassy hills and row a boat in the moonlight. You encouraged me to run for student government in school, even when I knew I wouldn't win the election. It wasn't the winning that mattered as much as the trying. For you it was always...."the principle of a thing".

Your love, encouragement, help in times of trouble....your strength, wisdom, support, and poetic creativity were all appreciated by your family. You may not have always been the most patient at times....but we all knew we were loved!

Your final breath was a quiet one. At first we didn't even realize your spirit had slipped the earthly bonds that tethered it. We looked at your peaceful face and then at one another....questioning. No words needed speaking at that time; for we all somehow knew....deep in our hearts. You had left our world. We clung to you for a time, finding it so hard to say good-bye. Tears flowed freely, as they do now when I think back to that day.

We spread your ashes near the blinking buoy on your beloved Hood Canal. Whenever I leave town after visiting Mom, I think of you as I pass by. I remember the buttercups we scattered in the water in your memory. I remember your songs, poems, and life lessons. I remember your courage when faced with the bad news that your cancer had returned....and your decision to accept the finality of this last good fight. You showed me what courage looks like and you showed me what love looks like. Thank you for that Dad. You will always be my hero.

Dorothy

* Gather Buttercups *

March 21, 2007 marks the two year anniversary of my beloved father's passing from this earthly life. As this bittersweet day approaches, I find myself reflecting on the motto that characterized his life...a personal philosophy that motivated him as a teacher, husband, father, and man. My father called his life's motto "Gather Buttercups." His motto has lived on in the hearts of his children and grandchildren and is a legacy we treasure and attempt to pattern in our own lives.

In nature, as in life, we often fail to note or appreciate the small, seemingly insignificant things around us. Stop! Observe! Appreciate! There is nothing special about a buttercup. It's only a weed. Or is it? Look again closely! Whether a flower or a weed depends on the observer. Whether in life or in nature, if we look for or expect weeds, that is what we find...that is what we see. To appreciate the buttercup is to recognize value in all things.

I am ever thankful to my dad for teaching me to open my eyes, focus on the positive, and seek out where buttercups bloom. I have been able to gather them into "bouquets" of experiences that have touched my life in very special ways. Each day I discover buttercups abounding....with my family, students, and the special friends who have blessed my life!

Thank you Dad for all your have been to me throughout my life....my protector, my teacher, my rock, my counselor, my cheerleader, my Daddy Don, my friend. My life is all the richer because of you. Godspeed Dad. May God hold your spirit close until we meet again on that glorious day when we are raised imperishable. On that day, we will once again hold each other close and spend time together "gathering buttercups!"

Your Loving Daughter,

Dorothy